old photos, timeless teasures

I've spent the day cleaning out one of my Lola's cabinet. It should have taken me at most 40 minutes, because its really just a small space but since I was really looking through all her stuff, it took me two hours. I'm a sucker for old pictures and here are some them that I just can't help but...well, for the lack of a better word, steal. (Don't tell on me!)

Lovely couple right? These are my grandparents. They got married when my Lola was 16 and my Lolo was 22. They lasted for 51 years, until my Lolo died last year. Those 51 years are not all rosy, but they stayed together and they stayed in love until the last day. If you noticed, the picture was ripped apart but it was taped back together again; with a red, electrical tape! Now, that is true love.

This was taken during my christening party. My Lola is carrying me, while my mom sits nearby with the other guests, and her Lola is in the forefront looking every bit of a Doña that she is. Do you notice, there wasn't a single guy in the photo? I love this picture, it says a lot about how my family does things. If mothers are oceans the daughters never escape from, then the grandmothers must be the sky that would never leave us.

My parent's wedding picture, with their parents. I took these because I want to examine what features they have that I inherited and with a deeper analysis, what personalities they have that they passed on. You wouldn't see this, but I hate my mom's make up! Okay, from left to right are Daddy Tatay, Mpmmy Nanay, Momy, Daddy, Mommy Lily and Lolo Jorge. I think I have my Mom Lily's chhekbones and the shape of her face. I have my Dad's nose and smile. I have my Mom's eyebrows and my Daddy Tatay's eyes. I have my Mom's ears.

One of them is me, the other isn't; but both pictures have a caption that said "sweet smile from baby yna!" No wonder I didn't recognize the other baby, it was actually my brother. Haha, he got mistaken for a girl! He was wearing pink and little flowers to boot! I looked like my mom in this picture, but now I look more like my dad. My brother look like his son.

This day was lovely.

dahil walang kausap at cable tv

Naisipan ko na magsulat sa tagalog ngayon dahil Agosto. Dahil Buwan ng Wika ang Agosto, sinususpindi ng mga paaralan ang kanilang "Speak in English policy" kaya naisipan ko na ganoon din ang gawin. Nung sinimulan ko kasi angv blogv na ito, isa sa mga hangarin ko ay ang maibalik ang disiplina sa pagvsusulat kaya pinili ko na mag-sulat sa ingvles kasi mas madali magpahayag ngv nararamdaman sa ingles. Halimbawa, yung sinulat ko ng nakaraan. Dapat ay sa tagalog ko iyon isusulat kaso, hindi ako makaisip ng salitang tagalog para sa "crazy", hindi ko magamit ang "kabaliwan" kasi masyadong mabigat ang salitang iyon para sa akin. Hindi naman kabaliwan yung ginawa ko, ang alam ko nagiisip pa ako nung ginawa ko iyon. Higit pa dun, maliit na bagay lang yung ginawa ko, hindi sapat na tawaging kabaliwan. Siguro, hindi ugali ng mga Pinoy na gumawa ng mga ganoong bagay kaya walang salita para doon. Sabihin nyo sa akin kung mayroong salitang tagalog para doon, baka naman nagkakamali lang ako.


Ngayon ko lang napansin na madalas palang ginagamit ang letrang "g" sa mga salitang tagalog. Nagloloko kasi ang keyboard ko ngayon, kapag gumagamit ako ng "g" may lumalabas na kasamang letrang "v" kaya kailangan kong burahin lahat ng letrang "v". Kung may nakaligtaan ako, pasensya na.

Napansin ko din na mas malumay at seryoso ang tono ng pagsusulat ko kapag tagalog ang gamit ko. Sa totoo lang, napansin ko na ito nung nasa kolehiyo pa ako. Kahit subukan ko na lagyan ng kaartehan o komedya, hindi lumalabas na ganoon kadalasan nagiging melo-dramatiko at nag-uumapaw sa damdamin at nahihirapan akong kontrolin.


Sa kalagayan ko ngayon, importante sa akin na manatiling kontrolado ang aking nararamdaman. Kadalasan kasi negatibo ang mga ito, kaya lalong kailangan na kontrolin. Alam ko na may mga naisulat ako na puno ng galit, sabihmin na langv natin na iyon na angv kalahmdongv bersyon. Isipin mo na lang kung nasa tagalog iyon, mas magiging mabigat ang bawat salita baka hindi ko na maisulat at sumabog na lang kumpyuter sa tindi ng galit. Importante sa akin ang maglabas ng hinaing( hindi ba't isa iyon sa silbi ng blog?), lalo na kung galit ito (baka kasi ako ang sumabog) yun nga lang, hanga't maaari sa kalmadong paraan sana.


Hindi ko rin maisip kung paano ko isusulat sa tagalog ang mgva kwento tungkol kay Dollar Boy, baka lumabas na parang nobelang pang-romansa ito. Alam nyo ba ang salitang "flirt" sa tagalog? Landi. Landi ang katumbas ng "flirt" sa tagalog. Hindi iyon bagay sa imahe ko. Bukod pa dun masyadong negatibo ang pananaw sa salitang iyon. Hindi ko ito pwedeng gamitin.


Dahil wala akong magawa kanina, naisipan kong mag-friendster. Hindi talaga ako mahilig mag-friendster pero naisip ko na rin na kamustahin ang mga dating kaibigan, mga minsang hinangaan at minsang kahit kaunti ay minahal. Gusto ko lang malaman kung ano na ang pinag-bago ng buhay nila. Gusto ko din malaman kung may pakialam ako kung ano man ang nagbago sa buhay nila. Sa iba meron, sa iba wala masyado. Siguro kasi, wala namang malaking pagbabago sa buhay nila. O sadyang, hindi na ako interesado sa buhay nila.

Ang hirap talaga ng walang cable tv.

May nakapag-payo sa akin na kalimutan ko na si Dollar Boy kung hindi ko lang din siya yayain lumabas. Ito ay dalawang bagay na hindi ko pwedeng gawin. Nung una, naisip ko na tama siya. Napagdesisyunan ko na kung sa Disyembre ay wala pa ring nangyayari, kakalimutan ko na nga siya. Pero hindi. Ang pag-ibig ay hindi dapat binibigyan ng taning. Sino ako para pangunahan ang kagustuhan ng tadhana? Naghihintay lang ako. Kung darating ang panahon na kailangan ko na nga siyang kalimutan, bibigyan ako ng tadhana ng dahilan at hindi ko na kailangan pilitin ang paglimut sa kanya. Sa ngayon, hayaan ninyo lang ako na matamasa ang mga ngiti niya.

Chronicles of Dollar Boy 6

Once in a while, we need to do something crazy just to keep life from being mundane, so it won't be too boring. Maybe even to feel emotions we have forgotten.

When I wrote in a poem the words "drench me... flood every road, every vein...", I never imagined that fate would take it literally!

So I did something crazy last Wednesday. I guess its because the storm was lashing out in Manila. The roads are flooded and cars aren't moving so I have to spend 3 1/2 hours listening to the cheesiest radio station on air. Anyway, I felt I need to do something crazy in connection to Dollar boy. Just to keep him real. Like the real, crazy storm outside.

The Dollar boy in my head is cuter than the real Dollar boy. I realized that when my sister unfeelingly pointed out that he is not that cute. Maybe he is not that cute(he is still cute though), but not all overly cute guys have his slow-dancing stare that I'm so crazy about. It seems that my sister doesn't like him. First, she said that he was too giggly. Then, that cute comment and then she said something that I should hurry to get a job so I can meet someone else. sigh. She doesn't understand. I won't be interested in someone else. There is no one more intriguing than the guy behind the glass window.

He no longer beams at me like he used to. He just smiles. I don't understand, he chats with every person he assists but when it comes to me, it was all business-like, even the flirty smile disappears. So I have to do something drastic. Not minding that it was totally inappropriate.

After all, a girl gotta do what a girl have to do. And I have to ask about that ring, it no longer looks like a college ring to me(maybe it was a different ring, we'll never know). So when we are about to leave, I backtracked. I told him I have to ask him something. He said, "Yes, Ma'am?" (I find that amusing:)) Then there was a silent tension, for dramatic purposes, so he will get the essense of the question thoroughly. I asked him if the ring he is wearing is a wedding ring. He grinned and ask why. I replied, "Just because." He said no. I said ok and stepped away, I heard him laugh(sweet, sweet music). By that time, I was laughing too, I said thank you and saw the gay one in the cubicle beside him looking shocked.

So now he knows I'm interested in his civil status.

However this turns out, I got a kick out of what I did. I really enjoyed it. The last I felt that thrilled was the Japs Sergio event. And that is almost a year ago.

I felt alive that day. Maybe I should ask inappropriate questions more often.