or how my summer went.
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A big family drama started my summer that made me decide to go on self-exile. I needed space, lots of space and air to breathe. But my self-exile instead of being a statement of defiance had become a self-punishment because the room I am staying in is a brick oven. 38 degrees is alarming but acceptable, after all we are having El Nino, but 40 degrees? It's a wonder I didn't evaporate or had a heat stroke. During my exile, I had planned to exercise more, write more and fix my life. Instead I were sweating like I had never sweat before, not even when I'm climbing mountains, my brain had been turned into mush by the heat that even if I am already holding a pen against a paper, I still cannot write a word and self-pity, doubt and disillusion left me wondering, what life exactly am I trying to fix. I just feel so lost, maybe I really did evaporate.
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I only had one read for this summer, even if I have books waiting in line. It was too hot write, so it is also too hot to read. But I just cannot ignore this treasure of a book about Jose Rizal written by Nick Joaquin. It was so juicy that I learned so much about Rizal more than I did when I took up Rizal course in college and it was wonderfully written in Nick Joaquin's style that oozes with romance and patriotism.
Did you know Laguna de Bay is not a bay like Manila Bay but is named after the town of Bay(ba-e)? I know it is a lake, hence Laguna lake but had always been confused why it is also a called a bay since it is clearly not a bay, but I never bothered to find that out. That had confused me since I studied types of bodies of water in grade school.
Back to Rizal, we have a geek for a national hero. Hooray geeks! Like all geeks, there was a time when Rizal had been so insecure. He was so short, especially since his point of reference is his big brother Paciano. (Paciano is tall, good-looking, smart, a bit taciturn but let's use the term mysterious. Those are the exact adjectives that describes my friend's idea of a perfect guy.) Paciano is ten years older than Rizal, so in Rizal's point of view Paciano had been looming over him all his life. But Rizal idolized Paciano, so even when he become this big shot who has a college degree, a doctor, wrote two great novels and Paciano is just a haciendero who got stuck in Laguna, Rizal still heeded Paciano's advice and instructions; Paciano is still Kuya and what Kuya said, is what we would do. That is another thing I love about this book, it gave us a glimpse on Rizal's family. It explained why they have four surnames, their social status, their daily life. The children made their own toys, so early on Rizal's inventiveness and creativity is on full display, he had a puppet theater! Rizal taught himself to read at age two, he sculpts a lot, they all had ponies, then horses when they were big enough. Their dining table is always full of food. Everyone eat at the same time, after all they weren't in a restaurant where they can eat anytime they want. The parents are called Nanay and Tatay, Tagalog is the language they used. After dinner is story-telling time, Tatay tells about history and foreign heroes, sometimes the yaya gets the spotlight and tell stories about ghost and nocturnal creatures. What is endearing is that after a hundred years, except perhaps of the kids making their own toys(hey, sometimes this is still true)and the ponies, the Rizal family is still a lot like the modern Filipino Family. Television might have replaced story-telling but it still occurs during blackouts, and the yayas are still good sources for horror stories.
Rizal had many women, it seemed like he had a girlfriend from every country he had been to, which basically means he had girlfriends across the world, all the while having a fiance back home. But the one girl I want to focus on is Segunda Katigbak. She was 14, he was 20 but it was she who made the first move, second, third, the fourth and so on. She was so feisty, she always leave Rizal babbling for words and blushing. I bow down to this girl. But then because of Rizal's timidity, bordering on stupidity, she choose a more fervent suitor to marry, ultimately breaking Rizal's heart. I just have to repeat this, she was 14!
It is also scary at the same time amazing Rizal's knowledge about his destiny. Even as a kid, he knows he would die young and that they would erect statues of him, even though the statements he made are just mere retorts to his sisters' teasing; it is baffling how true it turned out to be. He had a lot of chance to opt out from his doomed destiny, he could have stayed in Hongkong or in Dapitan or proceed to Cuba as he had planned; heck, he could have not gone to Spain at all, stay here and become a haciendero like his father and marry his Leonor. But no, even if he is hesitant, even if he dreads the idea that his death would be such a big deal to his country he still answered the call of greatness. For someone who had been so insecure and did anything to excel to compensate for his shortcomings, he had become afraid of how great he had been; still he shrug fear off and accepted his fate.
I love the fact that our national hero is not some great army general like most heroes are. I know that the Americans choose Rizal for us over Bonifacio, so that we would look up to someone who does not yield a deadly weapon but a pen, but Rizal also embodies everything that we hold dear. He was a small guy who did great things. More than that, Rizal achieved the Filipino Dream; he he saw the world and came home triumphant. Also, the wisdom he imparted from his writings are still applicable until today. He is both world-class and timeless.
More fun facts I learned from the book: Rizal is short right? but Marcelo H. Del Pilar is shorter. There were two Leonors, both were engaged to Rizal at the same time. Rizal, even after renouncing the church, continued to attend mass everyday. He seem to like prostitutes. And the one thing that blew me away: Mariano Ponce is a doppelganger of the guy I've been crushing on for four years.
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This summer was not only extra hot because of El Nino but also because of the election fever that is sweeping this nation. After all, this is the first automated election and the one that would free us from nine years of hell, so naturally everyone is in his/her own state of excitement, confusion and cynicism. And on May 10, my lovely crazy country voted for Noynoy Aquino to be our president. Beyond all the high-tech graphics of the news coverage (abs totally kicked gma's ass on that account), it was just so amazing that the results were known after 24 hours or so and because of that we have seen something we had never seen before: politicians conceding!!! That was a miracle, especially in this country where no one lose an election because they were always cheated. Everyone was jubilant, for after nine years we once again have a president that the people elected, and if he screw up we only have ourselves to blame. But of course not everyone got the memo that it is now fashionable to concede so they were some who still cried foul and that gave birth to Koala Bear. Losers from left and right follow suit, taking advantage of the unfamiliarity of automation, the idea of a successful clean election, and the comelec as the good guys. I did not mind this at first until I passed by one newspaper stand and the name Koala Bear is hugging the headlines. That was the most absurd thing in the world. It just sounds so silly that we were all caught up by someone named Koala Bear. The name he gave was Robin, Rep. Locsin named him Koala bear because of his stupid mask, and he claimed to have rigged the local election results, then came losing candidates that claimed they also got an offer to rigged votes but did not buy in therefore they lost. But then they cannot back up they claim with stronger evidence because they forgot who it was that made the offer and so, basically Rep. Locsin just told them to shut it.
Who won as president is pretty much set with Noynoy being ahead so much that if you add Erap and Villar's votes, he could still win, but the VP race is a cliffhanger. Now, I voted for Binay but if Mar lost, it would be really heart-breaking like it-could-be-made-into-a-movie-sad! After all the cheesy commercials, wedding stunts, twittering about the honeymoon, the "big sacrifice" he made it still came to nothing. Sigh, politics in the Philippines, it is never boring. It can be irritating and nauseating that it makes you want to forsake this country but it is never boring.
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So that's how my summer went. I remember it being more dramatic but I guess the drama didn't matter that much.
