World, say hello to the luckiest kid!

My nephew was born last friday and right now I am typing beside his crib while he is sucking on his milk bottle.


He is small. Well, he is normal size compared to kids his age but compared to me, he is small. I don't know if I can call him fragile. My friend descride me as fragile and I think this baby is more than fragile. At the same time, I also think this baby is tough. He have really small arms; small, delicate arms but you should see how he raise them up as if saying "World! Bring it on!"

Fun fact: he was born on a Friday the 13th. What is fun about it is he does not only have regular birthdays but also Friday the 13th celebrations. This kid would get so used to receiving presents.


He doesn't do much. He actually sleeps all day. And drink milk in between. But every move and every sound he makes is amazing. Watching him sleep isn't boring at all. I can't actually stop looking. Nobody can. It's really weird.


He also takes up a lot of space. To think he is just 18cm, he takes up a lot of space. I used to have my classmates stay here overnight, there would be about four to seven of them and I can accomodate them all without intruding too much on my grandparents. But this baby came along and it looks like, well it looks like he now owns the house. I'm not complaining, just pointing it out. It just amaze me, how someone that small could yield so much power.


More on lucky son when he can do more.

****************


I saw dollar boy today. I didn't say "hi". I can't. I didn't looked perfect nor did I felt daring. Last week, I looked perfect and daring.

He is becoming less real. This sucks. I can't lose him without doing anything. That is just so me. I hate that part of me. Worse, I am going to obssess about this for the next two weeks until I see him again and say "hi". He is becoming less real! You know, more like a shadow but in color. Like when you lessen the opacity of an image in photoshop. This is really bad. Even a shopping escapade did not cheer me up! I finished my poem for him though. How I wish I have the guts of the speaker in the poem. But I am the speaker in the poem! I just wish it would translate from poetry to real life. I am not sure of the title, I can't think of anything right now. But I think the poem is decent. Sigh


Rain Song

You are the clouds that reign over Manila in June.
And it looks like there is no escaping you.
Every commuter and street peddler
hurries to seek cover. But not me, I lay down
on the streets of this old city. And I dare you.

Drench me.
Let your waters flood every road, every vein,
every corner and every thought. Turn this city
into an ocean I would never escape from.
Because my dear, if I drown in the puddles
of your eyes, I really wouldn’t mind.

"... I lay down on the streets of this old city..." Yeah right! I couldn't even say "hi". The thing is, if I drown in his eyes; I really, really would not mind it at all.

Chronicles of Dollar Boy 5

He wasn't there.


But unlike before, I don't hate it as much. I actually thought it was funny. Sometimes, things just won't go your way. And me not being pissed off, is part of the all new "not worrying about it too much" rule.


So much for feeling confident and wearing the perfect make-up. Atleast, I discovered a new combination of color for my lips. But the positive things pretty much end there.


I shouldn't have gone today. There was sign, my kuya told me to just do it on Friday. But I figured I may not have the unusual confidence I was feeling this morning so I went ahead.


I'm starting to think my instincts are no good.


I'll still go to philtrust next wednesday. I have to see him. I miss him. But there's no way, I'm going to flirt with him in front of Rozza. She doesn't know about dollar boy. And she's my little sister. Argh.


I really do miss him. Funny, his absence sort of adds to his character. Sigh. He is not making my life easy, now I have to think of what to wear on Wednesday. Men.

Chronicles of Dollar Boy 4

John Krasinski isn't dating anyone.

Someone as adorable, talented, and has a smile that can make you floatin the air as John Krasinski is totally available. Huh. To think that he stars at a hit comedy show and is also starring in his first movie lead role with Robin Willams and Mandy Moore, his being single is very interesting.

It is not the most impossible thing in the world for Dollar boy to be unattached right? The thing is when I was 16, I've read this book Wizard's First Rule and it said that people are stupid; people would believe what they want to believe becase they want it to be true or because they are afraid that it is true. I sort of taken it to heart, so now I second guess everything I believe. For example, the ring on Dollar Boy's finger; it looks like a college ring but it can also be a very big, very intricate wedding ring. So I debated with myself for months before choosing to believe that its a college ring until proven otherwise. Another is his name; sometime last year my Lola called her bank and talked to the teller to assisted her the previous day. She also innocently shared to me that his name is Raymond. Hmm... could Raymond be Dollar boy? Because it was Dollar who assisted my Lola with her accounts the day before. But it seemed too easy, so I refuse to believe it until I heard it for myself. I don't want to believe something only to be dissapointed that it isn't true. I don't think I can handle dissapointment with this guy. In May, when I saw a girl flirting with him and I realize that it was so easy with other girls yet for me flirting with him is like taking a Political Dynamics exam; I sort of had difficulty breathing for the next two days. So no, dissapointment is totally out of the picture.

Anyway, last month I devise this action plan on how I would get him. For June my goal is to confirm his name and I achieved that. I heard someone call him Raymond. So there, my Lola was right. Suddenly, Raymond became a beautiful name. Though I sort of hope that I would know his name when he introduce himself to me but I guess God works in His own way. I'll take anything I can get. For this month, the goal is to flirt with him, verbally or non-verbally I just have to try to flirt with him. I feel sorry for myself that I have to write that. It seemed so desperate. The thing is, my friends are right, I have to do something because if I don't nothing would come out of it. I have to make Dollar boy happen and its up to me to make it happen. Easy for them to say, their brain doesn't freeze whenever his eyes drowns my soul. Sigh, but they're right. Anyway, the world had been desperate a long, long time ago; I guess desperate wouldn't be so bad.

So, we have to do flirting. Talking just doesn't cut it because I tried talking and it wasn't anywhere near flirting it was more like a disaster. I am thinking I should start with something small like smiling back. Not a polite smile, but something naughty and flirty but not too much. The smile should stay on the sweet side. My friend says if I did that, I probably get to go out with him some time next year, that is if he haven't impregnated someone and married her by that time. I need to do something more proactive. But I am not proactive. I wish I could develop this skill where you can make people do what you want but make them think that it was actually their decision to do it. Like, if I am going to ask Dollar boy out, I have to make it appear that he is actually the one asking me out. But I can't develop that skill in a week and I don't think I have the character for that. Sigh. I think I can say "hi". Especially if I am feeling unusually brave and compose that day. I can come up to him and say "hi". What if he doesn't say "hi" back. You see the two times I've talked to him he sort of just stood and looked at me until I've finished what I had to say. One time, I said "hello" before anything else and he didn't say "hello" back; though it must be because I immediatly luanch into explaining what I need for him to do. But he always had that surprised look in his face but he is quick to recover though. Well if he doesn't say "hi" back, I'll just kid him about it that since he was always smiling at me, I've figured that I would be friendly and say "hi" and now that I did, I will now go on my way. And then I could pray that he'll tell me to stay and then he will be friendly in return. Do you think its too much to ask? What if he just stood there? I can still play it cool but I have to be very, very compose for me to pull it off. Maybe I'll just try smiling back and leave the actual verbal flirting for next month.

I need a flirt master. Someone to train me in the effective ways of flirting. ASAP.

I am a very, very silly girl.

Top ten stuffs I like!

To amuse myself, I've been listing all kinds of different top tens that I like and they are so fun to do. They can really make you think and know more about yourself.


Top Ten English Words that I Like
(I based my choices on the way they sound, their meaning and how they look)
1. soothing
2. live
3. summer
4. dream
5. subtle
6. always
7. imagine
8. free
9. magic
10. written


Top Ten Filipino Words that I Like
1. kita (the pronoun, this is actually my fav word in all languages)
2. sige
3. pag-ibig (this word can never be without emotion)
4. tula (this one evoke the image of leaves and the sound of wind, also cute guys with long hair)
5. bituin
6. tawa
7. minsan (it just seem romantic)
8. lola
9. awitin
10. mismo!


Top Ten Favorite Food
(food, drinks, anything digested)
1. chocolate cake
2. kaldereta
3. chocolate and strawberry syrup
4. Mommy's spaghetti
5. Coke (too bad i can only drink a glass of it a month)
6. jollijeep's pinoy bistek
7. cereals
8. milkshakes
9. double-dutch ice cream
10. ice-cold Milo


Places I want to go to and intend to go to
1. Batanes
2. Bicol (my kuya and I used to plan that we will go to bicol by train, well, the railroad is now closed and he is now married, soI guess the plan is off.)
3. Cebu
4. Vigan
5. Paris (for the lights and fountains!)
6. Russia
7. New York
8. Rome
9. Greece
10. Japan (for the cherry blossoms)


Top Ten Fictional guys I like
1. Mr. Darcy
2. Shrek
3. Jess in Gilmore Girls
4. Jim in the Office
5. Victor in Tondo man may Langit din ( I really like the line " Si Alma man may Victor din." And since then I've been wanting to say that.)
6. guy in Anastasia
7. Lukawa
8. Ewan in Moulin Rouge
9. Wa Zhe Lei
10 Dao Ming Su ( its so hard to choose between the two of them, I like those kind of problems)

Let's try to analyze this:
6 of them are not people person.
5 of them can be pretty bad-ass.
7 of them had been involved in fights.
2 of them are idealistic.
1 is a gentleman.
1 is an ogre.
3 of them are filthy rich.
2 of them live in filthy homes.
5 of them are sarcastic.
9 of them would do everything for the girl they love.
All of them are pretty intriguing, well atleast to me.


Ten Girls I wanna be
1. Keira Knightly (at 20 she got to kiss Johnny Depp and Mr. Darcy!)
2. Patricia Evangelista ( She's pretty gutsy, I mean she takes on the military in a smart-yet-naive-girl kind of way. I envy her feeling of invincibility yet I get worried when I don't see her column on sundays.)
3. Oprah (imagine having that much influence on people, and that much money, and a boyfriend that would totally let you adopt an extra puppy)
4. Gayle( imagine being Oprah's BFF, and she makes your wildest dream come true by making Josh Groban sing "When You Say You Love Me" to you in room full of yellow roses, and go all over america in search of the best cakes and hamburgers and be paid for it. I actually want to be Gayle more than Oprah)
5. Satine ( I want to sing a duet with Ewan McGregor)
6. Izzie Stevens ( I like her pretty disposition in life and she's really pretty)
7. Summer Roberts ( I like her life, there's enough to keep things interesting but the drama is happening just to the people around her. Her problems are only realistic ones. My life used to be like that, except I don't live in the O.C., rich or can pull off a bikini.
8. Halle Berry (she's really pretty)
9. Kit Kwe (it would be cool to have Angelo Suarez write lovely poems about you, only I'm not sure I also want others to read it)
10. Dollar Boy's Girl (Damn!)